Dear Self, Breathe.

Taking care of your physical appearance is important, but nurturing your mental and emotional well-being is just as—if not more—essential, especially during the healing process. For me, after a painful breakup that blindsided me, it became a necessity. A part of me felt like it had “died,” and I needed to rebuild from the ground up.

In this post, I’ll share the steps I incorporated into my routine that helped me regain stability. This is purely my personal experience, but I hope it inspires anyone on a similar journey.

1. Planner, Journal, and Daily Affirmations

These three tools were completely new to my routine. Before, my schedule was neatly stored in my phone, planned down to the minute. But after my breakup, I realized I needed more than digital structure—I needed a sense of control in the present moment.

• Planner: Helps me stay organized and gives me peace of mind knowing that I am in charge of my day, not past circumstances.
• Journal: Allows me to focus on positive thoughts and reflect on how I can make my days better. I start and end my day with it—writing in the morning to set my intentions and at night to process what went well and what I can improve.
• Daily Affirmations: A small notebook where I write positive statements to train my mind to adopt a more optimistic outlook.

2. Digital Diary & Notes

To process my thoughts post-breakup, I started keeping a diary. Initially, I used my phone’s Notes app, but later, I switched to a dedicated journaling app that I still use today. For me, it was a safe place to share my thoughts without feeling embarrassed.  

One habit that has helped immensely is keeping a list of unanswered questions that linger in my mind. I write them down instead of obsessing over them, and when I eventually find answers, I return to update my notes. This practice has been incredibly grounding, reminding me that clarity comes with time.

3. Pilates, Yoga, and Meditation

Movement and mindfulness have played a huge role in reconnecting with myself. Even on days when I didn’t want to leave my bed, these practices gave me a sense of purpose and calm.

• Pilates & Yoga: Help me stay active and present in my body.
• Meditation: Allows me to connect with the universe, feel grounded, and quiet my mind.

4. Weekly Walks in Nature

Spending time in nature—whether alone, with a pet, or a loved one—has been a powerful way to clear my mind and feel more connected to the world around me.

5. Exploring New Hobbies

Filling my time with creative hobbies has been essential in my healing process. When I paint, for example, I can fully immerse myself in the activity, momentarily freeing myself from worries. I have shared more about hobbies and their healing power in a separate post, so if you are interested, you can check it out.

6. Quality Time with Loved Ones

Whether it’s family or friends, spending time with people who genuinely care for you can ease a heavy heart. For me, rebuilding trust after my breakup was incredibly difficult. But through patience and effort, I slowly allowed myself to lean on those who had always been there for me.

7. Therapy

Seeking therapy was one of the biggest, yet most necessary steps I took. I knew I had to face not only the pain of my breakup but also past wounds that contributed to my struggles. Therapy initially pushed me far outside my comfort zone, but over time, I started feeling stronger. To this day, I continue attending sessions because I see the long-term value in prioritizing my mental well-being.

Healing isn’t linear, and it doesn’t happen overnight. But having a routine that prioritizes mental and emotional well-being can make the journey smoother.

If you’ve been through a difficult experience, what are some things that have helped you feel more like yourself again? I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments.