Dear Self, Breathe.

There comes a moment in life when you look in the mirror and don’t recognize the person staring back at you. It’s not about appearance—it’s something deeper. The things you once loved don’t bring you joy, your goals feel distant, and the version of yourself you thought you knew? Gone.

I know that feeling all too well. And if you’re here, maybe you do too.

Losing yourself is terrifying. It’s like screaming in a crowded room, but no one hears you—not even you. But here’s the truth: Even in that emptiness, you are still here. You’re not broken beyond repair. You just need to find your way back, step by step.

After my breakup, I felt completely disconnected from myself. Before and during the relationship, I thought I had everything figured out. But one day, life looked me in the eye and said, “It’s time to start over.” So I did. And along the way, I found small things that helped me rebuild—not into the person I was, but into someone even stronger.

Here are the hobbies that helped me, and maybe they’ll help you too. If not, that’s okay. The important thing is to start somewhere.

1. Express Yourself Through Art 🎨

You don’t have to be an artist to let creativity heal you. Painting, drawing, or even coloring by numbers can be incredibly therapeutic. Sometimes, emotions are too heavy to put into words, but they can be released through colors and shapes.

For me, painting by numbers became a safe space. It gave me a focus when my mind felt chaotic. The simple act of filling in colors where they belonged made me feel like, little by little, I was putting myself back together too.

2. Go for a Walk or a Hike 🚶‍♀️

When everything inside feels too loud, let nature quiet it down. Walk without a destination. Feel the wind on your face. Notice the way the world keeps moving, even when you feel stuck. It’s a reminder that you, too, will move forward again.

I used to hike with my partner, so doing it alone for the first time felt strange. But I bought myself a cute outfit and good hiking shoes and just went. The first time was hard, but then I realized—I was stronger than I thought.

3. Lose Yourself in a Book 📖

Sometimes, when you don’t know who you are, diving into someone else’s story can help you reconnect with yourself. Books have a way of making us feel understood—even when we don’t have the words for what we’re going through.

I’ve always loved romance books, but after my breakup, I started reading psychology and self-growth books. They helped me process what happened and gave me tools to heal. If you’re looking for something similar, I highly recommend Healing The Child Within by Charles L. Whitfield M.D. or The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle.

4. Move Your Body with Yoga, Pilates, or Meditation 🧘‍♀️

Your body carries emotions your mind tries to ignore. Stress, heartbreak, anxiety—it all gets stored inside. Movement helps release it.

I started with simple stretching, then tried Pilates, and eventually, meditation became a part of my routine. It wasn’t about getting fit—it was about grounding myself. For the first time, I focused on how I felt rather than how I looked. And for someone who struggles with emotions, meditation became a game-changer.

5. Face a Fear—Big or Small 🌱

When you don’t recognize yourself anymore, part of the reason might be fear—fear of change, fear of the unknown, fear of not being “enough.”

I decided to make my new year a year of change. I started saying yes to things that scared me. Some were small, like trying a new activity alone. Others were bigger, like putting myself out there in ways I never had before. And the more I pushed past my fears, the more I felt myself returning.

Final Thoughts: You Are Still Here

Even when everything feels unfamiliar, you are still here. You’re not lost forever—you’re just rediscovering who you are now. And maybe—just maybe—this version of you will be even stronger, wiser, and more aligned with who you were meant to be all along.

So take your time. Be patient with yourself. You’re not alone in this.

Have you ever felt lost like this? What helped you find your way back? Let’s talk in the comments. 💛